


Once In A Blue Moon

by nosefIower



Series: The Croods: Misadventures of the Betterman Farm Season 1 [6]
Category: Dawn of the Croods (Cartoon), The Croods (Movies), The Croods: A New Age (Movies)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Bedtime Stories, Comedy, Dysfunctional Family, F/M, Family, Family Bonding, Family Dynamics, Family Feels, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Heart-to-Heart, Humor, Love Story, Pack Family, Romantic Comedy, Sitcom, Women Being Awesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-18 00:13:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29234340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nosefIower/pseuds/nosefIower
Summary: The Croods: Misadventures of the Betterman FarmSeason 1Episode 6: Once In A Blue MoonThe Bettermans continue their story about how they met which involves Guy's parents, a tree, and a tale of atrocious knots
Relationships: Banana Bros (The Croods), Belt/Sash (The Croods), Eep/Guy (The Croods), Grug/Phil (The Croods), Grug/Ugga (The Croods), Hope/Phil (The Croods), Ms.Betterman/Mr.Betterman (The Croods), The Bettermans (The Croods), Ugga/Hope (The Croods), thunder sisters (The Croods) - Relationship
Series: The Croods: Misadventures of the Betterman Farm Season 1 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2094084
Comments: 10
Kudos: 17





	Once In A Blue Moon

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoy this installment of the Misadventures of the Betterman Farm - this week's story is a direct continuation of last week's installment "The Red Moon" for context. We continue to unravel the story of how the Bettermans met but will their story tie up some loose ends or will we get further tangled in the Bettermans feud? ;) enjoy ~

Phil Betterman rubbed the back of his neck nervously as if unsure where to begin the story of him and his wife, and Hope looked at him sharing the concern, “the truth is...,” he began, then trailed off

Phil lingered a gaze on his wife as the moon and fire illuminated her, the red and blue of the two lights lighting her like glows of fire and ice…

“Man is my maiden name!” he bursted out dramatically flailing his arms as if revealing a long held secret and finally releasing it “...she made it Better…” he carried on

The pack let out a gasp, even Dawn which made it apparent that her parents made it a habit to not tell her much about anything

Hope let out a quiet chuckle, “Hope Better at your service,” she said

“And Phil Man,” he responded, “she’s my...Better half,” he paused then added, “nothing says modernity like a joint last name!” with a cheery jolt of his hand

“We combined our names once we got married, naturally the Better had to come first,” Hope pointed out putting an emphasis on the Better

“It was quite natural indeed...” Phil looked at Hope and Hope looked at Phil and, if for a moment, it appeared that the walls they had built between them were slowly being lowered...

“So...how  _ did  _ you two become a couple?” Guy asked

The Bettermans looked at each other and then back at Guy and then towards the ground like mirrors mirroring the other’s image, “your parents,” they answered together

“My parents?” Guy asked a bit overcome with emotion. Eep took his hand and firmly gripped it so he could feel her presence

“It all began many moons ago…” Phil began to narrate

“We all lived in a small seaside village, it wasn’t much, you know a self-sustenance kind of lifestyle,” Hope continued in a tone that made it apparent she much preferred her current modern lifestyle compared to that of her past

“One day,” Phil said trying to take the reins of the story, “I was inventing a new way to make nets,”

“And by inventing he means floundering,” Hope interjected dryly

“Anyways,” Phil said trying to recover from her comment, “I might have...gotten caught in my own invention” he said lightly tapping his fingers together

“He did get caught in his own net,” Hope corrected flatly, “I saw something flailing in the distance and went over to see what it was, needless to say I cut him out of it and offered to help make a new one,”

“Ah yes,” Phil said, “because she found me irresistibly-”

“Hopeless,” she finished his sentence, “We tried making the netting again,” she sighed as if regretting her past decisions, “this time he tied a wrong knot around my finger while I was teaching him and got our hands stuck together in the weaving,”

“Ah yes,” Phil said, “I might have accidentally tied the knot…” as if trying to defend his poor knotting abilities, “I asked for your hand so I could undo it,” he directed at Ms.Betterman

“Well, you should’ve thought of that before tying the knot!” she snapped back at him, “anyways…” she said regaining composure, “I unraveled myself and stormed off after that,”

“Ah yes, she did do that...” Phil said recollecting the memory, “muttering something about me being hopeful,”

“Hopeless,” Hope corrected then paused, “Guy...this is where your parents come into the story, they were already lovers at the time,” she sighed, “your mom was my best friend...”

“And your father was my best bud…” Phil added

“What were the pet names they gave each other?” Hope asked looking at Phil for the answer of a lost memory

“Oh, it was-”

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Hey, there’s my ray of sunshine, I thought I’d find you in this tree,” he said taking a seat next to her on the branch

She smiled, “hey Ponytail” she teased

“It’s the latest fashion,” he teased back

“Wait - is that-” the woman who sometimes went by the name of Ray said peering at something in the distance from the tree, “is that Hope?”

“And Phil?” the man who sometimes went by the name of Pony added

“Together?” They questioned in unison looking at what appeared to be the Better girl and the Man boy holding hands with their bodies closely wrapped together...alongside a strange cluster of netting... 

“Impossible,” Pony whispered

“Oh, no, now she’s storming off,” Ray commented seeing Hope’s blurry figure stomp away

“Could you imagine those two as a couple?” Pony asked trying to control his laughter

“Impossible,” Ray remarked, “they would get on each other’s nerves...it would become a battle of wits, one always trying to outdo the other,” Ray giggled as the sun began shining through the leaves and highlighted her features

Pony leaned in and kissed her cheek

“What are you doing?” she asked, her tone fully inviting the gesture 

“I’m kissing my ray of sunshine,” he said lightly caressing the freckles on her cheek

“In that case,” she said, pulling his tunic so his body would lurch forward, “how would you like to be sunkissed too?” and she kissed him

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Ooh la la,” Belt cooed as Sash and him hung from Dawn’s waist

“Can we fast forward through this part?” Guy asked

“Ah, sure,” Hope said

“Ugh,” Dawn groaned, “I liked that part,”

“Why is Guy just like his dad?” Grug asked his face in his hands

“I’d say he’s just like his mom” Ugga inserted

“I’d say Eep and Guy are just like the both of them,” Gran muttered

Sandy howled in agreement to all those statements

“Can we not talk about my parent’s romantic lives!” Guy said sharply embarrassed but also happy to hear about his parent’s early life

“She told you all that?” Phil asked of Hope 

“Of course,” Hope responded, “us girls tell each other everything,”

“Can we hear more of the story?” Thunk asked giddily holding up his travel window

“Oh, yes,” Hope said, “now where was I, oh yeah-”

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Can you believe him!?” Hope huffed running into her best friend later in the day

“What are you talking about?” Ray had asked pretending not to know anything

“That Man kid, what’s his name,” Hope said fuming, “ Phelix? Pheasant?”

“Phil-”

“That weasel-! I tried to help him today and he got me all raveled in his poor excuse for a net!” Hope carried on

“Well he’s no fisherMan…” Ray said blandly with a tinge of a smirk fully knowing Hope was too tangled up in her own story to notice her subtle wit

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I can’t believe her!” Phil said gallivanting towards his best bud

“What are you talking about?” Pony asked also playing into the charade

“That Better girl, Hope!” Phil answered dramatically “she thinks I’m unworthy of tying knots!”

“But you don’t know how to-” Pony began

“Ludicrous!” Phil bursted, “remember my unofficial motto?”

Pony sighed a tad annoyed, “the Man bun makes the Man, but what does that have to do with Hope?” Pony asked noticing Phil fixing his prized hair style and hoping that it would just be another phase

“It’s all in the appearance, bro,” Phil said, putting an arm around Pony with his usual haughty tone rising back in his voice, I’m going to find her tomorrow and show her...

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“...show him how to tie the knot properly,” Hope huffed at the end of her rant to her best friend

“They’re just knots Hope,” Ray said bored as she had just spent the past hour hearing Hope fume about a minor inconvenience of an event that couldn’t have taken more than 10 minutes

“Just knots!?” Hope questioned, “what’s my unofficial motto?”

Ray groaned as she began to repeat her friend’s saying, “No one gets the better of-”

“The Better girl,” Hope finished 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Well, if dad was so bad at making nets, why did you want to go back and teach him?” Dawn asked her parents a little flirtatiously

“W-well, his knots were atrocious!” Hope sputtered 

“Where have I heard this before?” Grug asked deep in thought

Guy shrugged, “monkey see, monkey do”

“PIus,” Hope continued, “I thought he was kinda-”

“Cute?!” Dawn asked excitedly

“Pretentious,” Hope said flatly, “And I wanted to prove him wrong,”

“So now your parents had a bet,” Phil continued

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I have a proposal,” Ray said to her lover back up in the tree branches later that night

“What kind?” he asked as she wrapped him in her arms

“Let’s have a little fun” she said with a mischievous grin as she playfully tousled Pony’s hair, wrapping a strand around her finger to accentuate the coils of his ponytail, “Hope can’t stand Phil and Phil can’t stand Hope,” she began laying out her plan and creating another coil with his hair, “let’s try to make them keep running into each other and see what happens,”

Pony chuckled, “just for laughs?” he asked

“Just for laughs,” she agreed, “it was quite entertaining to hear Hope argue about Phil, there’s no way they would ever fall for each other,” 

Ray let out a guilty grin on how she saw her friend’s petty arguments with the Man boy entertaining, Pony let out the same grin as the moonlight lightly outlined the couple hidden in the foliage of the tree’s leaves

Ray cupped Pony’s chin as she releasing the final strand of Pony’s hair she had been working on, a soft curl by his ear and brought his face towards hers to kiss him

“What’s this all about?” he teased fully inviting her advances 

“The moon’s rays aren’t the only thing allowed to kiss you,” she said and then their lips touched

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Ms.Betterman!” Guy whined

“What? Your mother was always very detailed about the details,” Hope insisted

“I think it’s sweet,” Eep whispered to Guy and then leaning in a bit closer, “we could use a visit to our tree later tonight” 

“What was that?” Grug asked

“Nothing,” Gran hushed him keeping the couple’s secret, “go on with the story,”

“Well, the next day…” Mr.Betterman continued

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I’ve fallen head over heels!” Phil wailed

“How is this even possible?” Hope groaned watching as the Man boy was being held upside down hanging from his atrociously knotted net tangled to his feet. He still tried to stand proudly despite being inverted

“I tried to use the tree’s upper branches for leverage,” he tried to rationalize

“And now you’re stuck,” she said dryly, taking a knife out to Phil out of his cocoon once again, there was an audible thunk! as he hit the ground

“Okay,” she said, trying to regain a sense of patience, “today, I will attempt to teach you the hitch knot,”

Not even a moment later the two were once again tied together

Ray and Pony watched the whole show go down from their tree

“What’s happening ?” Pony asked

“Seems like the two are getting hitched,” she answered and they laughed as they watched the lump of net that contained the Better girl and the Man boy wriggle around trying to loosen itself

“You’re right,” Pony said wrapping his arm around her, “this was a great idea,” and the two, amused, continued watching their friend’s petty arguments from a distance

They stayed there until nightfall. The Better girl and Man boy could really argue for a long time it appeared

Pony began to yawn as the moon came out to greet the young lovers, “perhaps, we should be heading home,” he said nuzzling Ray. She stirred sleepily lifting her head from his shoulder

“Soon,” she said, “but there’s something I want to show you first,”

“Hmmm?” he asked curiously and Ray began climbing the up the branches of the tree, 

“Come with me,” she said motioning her head in an upward direction

They finally reached the top of the canopy and Pony was mesmerized to see such a sky filled with stars

“I come all the way up here when I need to think,” she said, “who knows what tomorrow will bring but I have a feeling they know,” she said motioning her head towards the stars

Pony took her hands in his and looked her deep in the eyes, “I can already see my tomorrow from here,” he said and they kissed. When the couple finally looked back up at the night sky they saw two stars falling

“I wonder where they’re travelling to?” Ray whispered, “it must be someplace far, far from here,”

“One day we’ll find that place,” Pony whispered back, “I promise,”

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Maybe that’s enough reminiscing for one night…” Ms.Betterman trailed off as the moon’s illumination began to enter the night sky whose gentle light was enough to get a glimpse of the tears welling in Hope’s and Phil’s eyes that they were trying so desperately to hide 

Eep looked at Guy and his eyes were glossy too

“Let’s pick up the story another time,” Hope said to the pack, and the rest of the family nodded without question

“Right!” The Bettermans said together quickly attempting to snap out of their emotion 

“Feud is back on then in three,” Hope started the count

“Two,” Phil counted 

“One,” they said together

The Bettermans shook hands and then went off in separate directions

Ugga and Grug watched their fellow thunder sister and banana bro disappear into the night and in a shared concern looked at each other, nodded, and then they too soon disappeared into the night’s cloak

“Hey,” Dawn said gently approaching Guy and taking his hand while Eep held his other, “they were my parents too,” she said with the beginnings of tears in her voice, “but I think it’s about time we start telling their stories or else their memories will be gone forever and I don’t want to lose them again,”

“Yeah, big brother,” Thunk said, running up to Guy and hugging him close as Sandy curled around Guy’s foot in a rare occasion of tame behavior coming from the feral child. They stayed there for a moment then his siblings let go and made their way back to the treehouse

Guy strained his gaze up at the sky as a way to hold back his sobs and felt a pat on his back coming from Belt still attached to Dawn’s waist, Guy nodded

Dawn nodded back in understanding and gently kissed Guy and then Eep on the cheek, “goodnight you two,” she said and walked back towards the treehouse

The couple watched her go until her figure disappeared into the dark

“Look,” Eep said, pointing up to the sky, “tomorrows traveling to another land,” and Guy watched as two shooting stars began to make their way across the sky

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Hope…?" Ugga called out softly into the night hearing a few soft sobs. She found Hope out in the fields next to the brook. "Hope…?" she called again sitting next to her friend, "do you want to talk about it?" 

The two sat in quiet for some time, letting the sounds of the stream fill in the silence until finally, "She was my best friend," Hope mustered, "It's been so many moons since I've talked about her…" 

Hope leaned in toward Ugga and rested a head on her shoulder. Ugga lifted her friend's head so that the two could meet eye to eye and kept her hand cupping Hope's face as an act of comfort, "I've lost many too" Ugga said and Hope began to turn her face away, “look at me,” Ugga said with a gentle firmness using both of her hands to cup Hope’s face, "but I've never lost my memories of them,” she said loosening her hands as Hope leaned her forehead unto Ugga’s

“I like to think they live somewhere up there," Hope said motioning her eyes’ gaze back up to the sky and its endless array of stars. The women detached their foreheads and Ugga wiped a tear away from Hope’s cheek 

More moments of silence passed and then, "Guy's mother would have loved you," Hope said and let out a quiet laugh, "in fact, I think she would have made a great thunder sister," she let out a slight chuckle and paused for a moment thinking, "...Sister Moon Ray…" she whispered as the light of the moon’s sphere highlighted the two women

“That’s a fine thunder sister name!” Gran said coming out from the cloak of night

“Gran?” Hope questioned surprised by the sudden presence of the Queen Matriarch

“What are you two yammering about?” she asked, seeing Hope’s puffed and irritated eyes, “back in my day we said all those who passed on became stars, isn’t that right O’Wimmins?” Gran questioned the brightest star in the sky then chuckled as if the star had replied to her. She then sat down next to the women, “ain’t no use crying over spilled shark’s milk, I already saw your Better husband do that this morning,” she said blandly and Hope stifled a laugh, “gotta let the past be the past, that’s what us sisters used to say, hell I don’t even know how I made it to my age,” she chuckled again, got up, and extended a hand out to Hope, “come on,” she said as if inviting a dawn of a new age and Hope took her hand

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Grug found Phil in a grove of bananas silently sniffling to himself 

Grug approached carefully and sat down next to Phil, “Is...uhhh...is everything alright...bro?” he tried 

A moment of silence passed as Phil attempted to recollect his sorrow to speak

"He loved bananas very much," Phil mustered and Grug nodded, "he was my first... bro," and this caused Phil to sob harder

Grug patted his bro as his way of communicating that everything would be alright which indirectly translated as “rock” in punchmonkey

“Yes,” Phil said nodding slightly and returned Grug’s pats on the back which indirectly translated as “you’re my rock” in punchmonkey

Grug once again patted Phil this time translating as “rock, rock, rock” in punchmonkey

And Phil returned the pats translating to, “bronana rock” in the ape’s language

The two men sat there for some time in silence letting the memories settle

And then after a few more moments the two got up and went in for a firm banana bro hug. Phil pulled back much more calm now and smiling a sorrowful smile, "Guy's father would have loved you," he said, “he would have made a fine banana bro” and with that the two began walking back towards the treehouse 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hope and Phil crossed paths as they were walking towards the treehouse. 

The feuding couple looked at each other's drying eyes 

They both took a step forward 

"Hope" "Phil" they said at the same time

"No, you first" again mirroring each other's words

More silence between them.

Then as if in sync, for a moment their walls fell and they reached for each other in an embrace and stayed there. They pulled back not shortly after, each wiping the last of their tears

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Eep and Guy sat in the branches of their secret tree next to the babbling brook suspended in a hammock looking at the night sky. Guy rested his body on Eep and she lightly stroked his hair as his tears were drying off

A light rustle was heard behind them and the couple turned their gaze to meet the sound which was met by Ugga’s presence

“How did you know about…” Eep began

“Mothers always know,” Ugga answered to her daughter questioning how she knew of the couple’s ‘secret’ treehouse

“Can I talk to Guy?” Ugga asked

Guy lifted himself from Eep’s body and faced her and Eep looked for confirmation in his eyes. He gave a slight nod and the two got out of the hammock and into the foliage of the tree near Ugga

“I’ll give you two some time,” Eep said cupping Guy’s face for a moment and then disappearing into the deeper foliage of the tree

Ugga patted a nearby branch indicating for Guy to sit near to her and as soon as he did burst into tears. Ugga pulled the boy close which caused him to sob harder as the close embrace brought back memories of him and his mother as he felt her presence slipping into Ugga. Who knows how long they stayed there, Ugga rocking her body with the boy slowly and gently until he allowed himself to separate from her. She cupped his face, "they'd be very proud, I know I am," she said

"Plus kid's got a lot to live for" Gran added

“Gran, you've been here the whole time?” Guy asked, surprised yet not surprised and through the light of the moon Guy saw that Eep had been alongside Gran the whole time as well

Gran used her staff to push Eep and Guy together, "seems like your parents loved each other like you two love each other," she grinned, she patted Guy on the back, "that means they've always had their tomorrows" she gleamed and Guy saw something in her eyes that indicated she knew something he didn't, "well, let’s get going youngins, there's one last girl who needs comforting and you two have been taking up the most time!"

Ugga, Guy, and Eep stared at the Queen Matriarch, then followed in her lead 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dawn sat at the ledge of the highest part of the treehouse looking out into the horizon as the last remnants of the sunset left the sky and night fell in its place. She too had drying tears in her eyes she was trying to rub away. A small noise and then more. She turned around to see her mother and father emerge together onto the roof. Nothing said between them, they just came close to her and the three held each other tight. Then the rest of the noise appeared in the form of the Croods climbing up the tree on the ledge with Guy hugged around Eep's back gatorpiggy-back style. 

"It isn't sleep pile day," Dawn tried to comment playfully while trying to mask her quivering voice 

"No," Eep shrugged with a smile, "but we thought we could needed each other tonight - maybe a little more than we already do," 

And with that the whole clan, including the Bettermans (although on opposite ends of the sleep pile) wrapped themselves into a ball of warmth and family and fell fast asleep 

Dawn didn't sleep, she looked out from the top of the pile into the sky waiting for the sun to break its light into the dawn, as the cottony pink light hit her she finally rested her eyes for the remaining hours of the night 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“HIT SNOOZE!” Someone in the mass of bodies yelled and the waking of consciences made the sleep pile turn and contort everyone in it

Another grumble from Thunk's tummy, "I think it's breakfast time," the caveboy announced and Sandy snarled in agreement

Hope woke up groggy with her hair in the usual giant cluster that would form whenever she slept in the pile, "well, it's obvious you didn't wipe your disgusting a-

Sash covered Belts ears 

"feet!" Hope said aggravated as she somehow ended up wedged between Gran’s wig and Phil's feet last night

"Well,” Phil responded, waking up equally as groggy “this would be a perfect time for some fresh bitter bean juice...if I had any!" he announced 

"Well let me tell you something Mr.Bickerman-!" she snarled

“Mr.Bickerman?!” he questioned astonished 

"Good morning Mr.Bickerdad!" Thunk said "what's for breakfast?" 

Dawn watched the sunrise and the mass of bodies uncurl out of the sleep pile and smiled at how quickly things could go back to normal

Ugga and Grug took the opportunity to stop the Bettermans’ morning bicker routine, “Yes, let’s go to the dining room for breakfast,” they said and the clan disappeared down the steps except for Dawn, Eep, and Guy

Dawn grabbed Eep by the hand, “Hey,” she said excitedly, “let’s get some food and eat in your super secret treehouse!”

“How do you know about that too?” Guy whined as it seemed that Eep and his super secret treehouse was becoming less super secret with each passing day

“Us girls tell each other everything,” Eep shrugged

“Come on,” Dawn called out, “I'll make us breakfast and we can discuss phase 3 of get-Dawn’s-parents-back-together in your tree together!” 

Guy sighed, “well, at least the Bettermans and Grug don’t know about our tree,” 

“Oh, they’re about too!” Dawn chirped

“What?” Guy asked

But without explanation Dawn was already running off with Eep

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Author's Note:**

> Next week: What's a mooniversary?
> 
> When will we hear the next phase of the Betterman's love story?  
> Will Guy and Eep ever have privacy?  
> Will Grug discover their super secret (not so secret) treehouse?  
> Was Guy's mother always such a prankster?  
> Must "la la" always come after "Ooh"?  
> And what is the next phase of Dawn's plan?
> 
> Tune in next time for these answers and more!
> 
> thank you for reading! if you have any story suggestions feel free to leave them in the comments ! :) ~ always love to hear from y'all ~


End file.
